Q&F: Amp Up Before Your Score

Michael (Admin) | Oct 15, 2009 Entertainment, News & Editorials, Quick & Free

User rating: (1 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5)
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This is the app that, over the past week, has been written about over and over and over again… and now Pepsi is apologizing for it.

Apologizing is definitely the right move from a PR standpoint, but I’m just gonna come out and say what everyone else is apparently afraid to… AMP UP BEFORE YOUR SCORE IS FUNNY! Sorry ladies, I know it probably pisses off some of you, but for the rest who can see this app for the joke that it’s clearly intended to be, it’s pretty hilarious.

AMP UP Before Your Score is a very tongue-in-cheek guide to “scoring” with 24 different types of women who range from Aspiring Actress to Indie Girl to Trouble and everything in between. For each type there are numerous ways of engaging the lady that include pickup lines and various conversation starters that are customized for each personality. If you’re talking to Goth Girl, Before Your Score provides a list of vampires and goth bands. If you’re talking to Political Girl, the app launches an in-app browser and loads Obama’s Twitter account and some recent political news items. Pepsi went the distance here and actually put some thought into each content item and the result, although unfortunate for feminism, is an app that’s packed with some hysterically crude humor.

Are guys REALLY gonna use this app to pick up girls? OMG I hope not! I want to reiterate for all male readers, this app is a joke. It’s meant to be funny, not useful! If you’re actually trying to memorize everything in this app before talking to a girl, getting a date is probably the least of your problems. So, with that said…

Whether you’re looking to get angry, looking for a laugh, or just looking out of morbid curiosity, get AMP UP Before Your Score now while it’s still available and judge for yourself whether it’s offensive or funny (I have a feeling Pepsi’s gonna cave and pull the app). Yes, it’s crude and immature and (sigh) sexist, but what if Pepsi’s Amp Up energy drink comes up with an equally crude and sexist app aimed at women looking to bag some boytoys? There are plenty of less-than-flattering male stereotypes to rag on. Hmm let’s see… there’s the ever-popular Douchebag, the 40 Year Old Virgin, Mr. Sensitive, Annoying Frat Boy (Douchebag’s twin brother, actually), Heavy Metal Poser, Unemployed Loser… you could write an entire book on distasteful male stereotypes and, on behalf of all men on this planet, I am officially giving Pepsi permission to produce an equally sexist app about us! Go ahead, do it up. Fair’s fair, and funny’s funny, so let’s all just chill and LOL a little. :D

iTunes Link – AMP UP Before Your Score
Version 1.0
Reviewed on iPhone 3G OS3.1

Say what you will about the app being sexist, but you gotta admit the art direction is great!
Say what you will about the app being sexist, but you gotta admit the art direction is great!
Hey, why isn't Miss Businesswoman holding an iPhone?
Hey, why isn't Miss Businesswoman holding an iPhone?
The pickup lines in this app are classic
The pickup lines in this app are classic

If this were Rebound Guy, he'd be passed out on the floor with an empty bottle of Schlitz Malt Liquor
If this were Rebound Guy, he'd be passed out on the floor with an empty bottle of Schlitz Malt Liquor
Fake Name! C'mon now, isn't that just a *little* humorous...?
Fake Name! C'mon now, isn't that just a *little* humorous...?
Each profile type is customized with 'relevant' approach angles
Each profile type is customized with 'relevant' approach angles

Once again, it's a JOKE! Like anyone actually knows their carbon footprint number
Once again, it's a JOKE! Like anyone actually knows their carbon footprint number
If anyone's gonna get mad about this app it should be truckers and people who live in trailers!
If anyone's gonna get mad about this app it should be truckers and people who live in trailers!
Ok, even I'll concede that bragging about your conquests via social networks is pretty slimy
Ok, even I'll concede that bragging about your conquests via social networks is pretty slimy

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  • Amanda

    An article in the Northern Star (Northern Illinois University’s campus newspaper) encouraged me to research this iPhone application.

    Though you say it is intended as a joke, it’s the type of joke that perpetuates ignorant social standards/customs. If you want me to think it’s a funny application, give ME an application to laugh about with 24 different types of men that range from the ASPIRING ATHLETE to the “I-FRAT-HARD” GUY to the ARROGANT DOUCHEBAG and everything in between. Show me how to reduce a complex human being into a shallow stereotype and how to break up a marriage (complete with alibis). And don’t forget to give me enough memory so that I can enter a profile for every guy I bang with a date and comments (e.g. Bobby, 9/22/09, Big ego, little dick, cute friend named Joey.)

    Seriously, it’s not funny. It’s embarrassing. I’m embarrassed as a girl. And you should be ashamed as a guy. It degrades your sex, as well, and really makes me question “where are the nice guys” when this kind of application becomes so popular amongst the sperm-filled masses. If you think this is how girls are…if you’re soooo Tucker Max…try to score on your own.

  • Michael (Admin)

    Hey Amanda, in a way I think we’re both on the same side! I totally agree, put out another stupid app that highlights all the jackass stereotypes that guys fit into (see the last paragraph of my review).

    IMO, the only way this app can hurt is if guys actually try to take it seriously and “use it” to log and brag about their conquests, and I’ll be the first to stand up and say those guys are total douchebags!!

    Btw I went to NIU before they kicked me out for being drunk & disorderly… Go Huskies 8) and an NIU alum is on Monday Night Football right now (Larry English, linebacker for San Diego Chargers)