Q&F: Family Guy: Uncensored Free

I don’t review a lot of “lite” versions of apps, but I freakin’ love Family Guy so I had to try this one out!

Family Guy: Uncensored Free opens up with a little intro from Brian and Stewie where they call you a jerk for being too cheap to buy the full version and then encourage you to “enjoy the crappy free game”. Ha, ok, kind of funny… I like it. If you don’t watch Family Guy, it’s probably one of the crudest, most politically incorrect shows ever made so the insults are both welcome and expected.

Unfortunately, the talking dog and the evil baby are right… this lite version is crappy. SlideToPlay’s YouTube demo of the full version looks like it could actually be fun, but this lite version is totally underwhelming. It’s well-produced and the sound and graphics are pro (nice job, Glu), but the stages represented here really could be any old platform game if you replaced the characters with monsters or robots or Capcom’s Mega Man.

Thanks for the warning!

I made it all the way to the boss battle where Stewie needs to defeat Bertram, his archnemesis, on my first try and it was equal parts boring and easy. The only hard part is beating the boss which I’ll admit I still haven’t done after a couple of attempts, but to be honest I really don’t care.

The app includes mini-games which are really just regurgitations of the parts leading up to Bertram, and there’s also a section where it shows other levels that are included in the full version of the app.

When you start playing a game that’s modeled after a ridiculously funny cartoon you have a right to expect it to be at least mildly amusing, but there’s very little about this app that’s entertaining. In the full version it looks like there’s stuff that’s actually relevant to Family Guy, ie: Quagmire swinging through a jungle of nearly naked skanks and Chris battling the evil monkey that hides in his closet, but based on gameplay alone this lite version isn’t very good at selling it.

I get why this app is so high up on the Top Free list in the App Store… it’s Family Guy, after all… but if you’re going to download it be prepared for disappointment. No giggity here.

iTunes Link – Family Guy: Uncensored Free
Version 1.0
Reviewed on iPhone 3G OS3.1.2

YAWN! Even Brian looks bored out of his mind.