WTF: Poo Log
Michael (Admin) | Aug 27, 2009 Healthcare & Fitness, WTF?!
User rating: 
(4 votes, average: 4.75 out of 5)
(4 votes, average: 4.75 out of 5)
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There are lots of ways to pass the time when you’re squeezing one off in the bathroom… read a magazine, call your mom, pluck your treasure trail… but none of these activities will teach you a damn thing about your poo!
The hilariously named Poo Log is part fecal tracker, part bathroom timer, and part trivia game, and it’s all pulled together in a surprisingly fun app that you can use to create, well, a different kind of poo log than you’re used to producing while you’re on the can. With this app you can time how long it takes to do your business and how often you’re doing it, and to keep you busy there’s a poo-related trivia game, that is, assuming your ass isn’t unleashing the kind of chaos that requires you to hold on for dear life. When the smoke clears you get to rate your crap in several different categories and even make notes about how majestic it looks down there in the toilet bowl.
WTF: iWakeupGirls
Michael (Admin) | Aug 27, 2009 Entertainment, WTF?!
User rating: 
(3 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5)
(3 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5) Loading ...
Waking up to a beeping alarm clock sucks. That’s why there are apps that let you wake up to your music instead, or perhaps some internet radio from around the world. That’s great and all, but pathetic losers like me who wake up alone every day with morning wood demand more!!
iWakeupGirls by Branded Research is a goofy collection of really short video clips that start looping when the app’s built-in alarm goes off. Instead of being jolted out of dreamland by your usual means, you get your choice of a bunch of hot girls with one-liner wake up phrases that range from slutty “good mornings” to other things that are more obscure or just plain weird. Here’s a quick sampling of some of the more bizarre phrases you’ll hear from the ladies of iWakeupGirls:
Coffee is for closers, now you better get with the program!
Gym… bar… gym… bar…?
Hey, this is a corporate environment!
You can be an angel, or you can be a devil.
Urgent weather bulletin, tornado coming through! ( and the girl starts spinning)
Um… huh? I sort of get the corporate stuff (of which there’s plenty), but some of these other phrases… eh whatever! If you’re truly waking up, it doesn’t really matter what what the girls are babbling about as long as you can hear it in your sleep.
WTF: Ask Uncle Boris
Michael (Admin) | Aug 12, 2009 Entertainment, WTF?!
User rating: (1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
(1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5) Loading ...
The things crazy old men will do for a dollar these days...
If John Tabernik were my best friend and he came to me and said, “hey I’m gonna make an iPhone app that’s like a Magic 8 Ball except instead of the 8 Ball it’s gonna be pics of an old Russian guy spouting nonsense,” I would have slapped him across the face and called him an idiot!
Apparently John doesn’t have friends like me so he went ahead and created Ask Uncle Boris, the 8 Ball that isn’t an 8 Ball but you desperately wish it were.
Ask the poor old man trapped inside this app a question and he’ll reply with one of 30 yes/no/maybe answers, and not only do you get to read his nuggets of wisdom but you have to HEAR them, too!
File Ask Uncle Boris under So Dumb It’s Funny and move on with your iPhone life. Oyyy!
(Sorry guys, no free codes on this one! Try to hide your disappointment :razz:)
iTunes Link – Ask Uncle Boris
Version who cares
Reviewed on iPhone 3G OS3.0
WTF: Flexible Girls
Michael (Admin) | Aug 12, 2009 Lifestyle, WTF?!
User rating: (4 votes, average: 3.75 out of 5)
(4 votes, average: 3.75 out of 5) Loading ...
If you’re scanning iPhone App Reviews.net for reviews of “sexy girl” apps, you won’t find many! I’ve tried a couple and they’re all so… BLAH. Don’t get me wrong, I love nearly-naked ladies as much as the next horndog, but seriously… you can stare at all the boobies you want in Safari by searching Google Images or a similar service.
Something that’s a little harder to come by is pics of girls who are scantily clad AND bending their bodies in some very unnatural and scary-looking poses. And thus Eighth Art brings you Flexible Girls! It’s Sexy Girl app meets Freak Show and, even if you’re completely uninterested in looking at ladies, it’s kind of hard to look away from these very fetishy pics.
WTF: Sexy Models Screen Wash
Michael (Admin) | Aug 5, 2009 Entertainment, WTF?!
User rating: (2 votes, average: 3.50 out of 5)
(2 votes, average: 3.50 out of 5) Loading ...
Sexy Models Screen Wash is supposed to be a geeky joke you play on iPhone virgins by showing them that “there are hot models living in your phone just to clean your screen”. It gives you two different screens that look like they’re halfway functional and, depending on which one you’re using, a guy or a girl will magically walk into frame and wipe down your iPhone screen with a Shamwow.
Okaaayyyy… first I’d like to point out that the words “hot models” is used pretty liberally here. There’s only one girl and one guy, and while I wouldn’t call either one “ugly” they’re definitely not what you think of when you hear the word HOT.
WTF: Affirmations Pro
Michael (Admin) | Aug 5, 2009 Lifestyle, WTF?!
User rating: (2 votes, average: 1.00 out of 5)
(2 votes, average: 1.00 out of 5) Loading ...
Welcome to the very first app review to fall under the newly-minted category WTF?!
When I’m feeling down, nothing brightens my day more than encouraging words from a creepy robotic voice!
I am rock solid!
I am confident at all times!
Other people think I am a good person!
My self-confidence is my weapon against the world!
Apparently Affirmations Pro comes with a total of 90 affirmations that sound like they were recorded with the talking voice from a 20-year-old Mac, and to treat yourself to these first-person nuggets of wisdom all you need to do is tap on the ultra-cool sunglass smiley faces that fill the screen.
WTF?!
Michael (Admin) | Aug 5, 2009 Website Stuff, WTF?!
User rating: (2 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5)
(2 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5) Loading ...Hey it’s a NEW FEATURE!
We generally try to review apps that look like they at least have potential, and once in a while we’ll toss out a Q&F review, but I think it’s time to start having some weekly fun with apps that just make you go WTF?! And that’s what WTF?! is all about… paying homage to, and when necessary making fun of, apps that are so dumb you can’t help but laugh (or cry?), or ones that are just plain out there.
WTF?! app reviews will generally be posted on Wednesdays if I manage to actually stick to the schedule I’m cobbling together, but if the other writers here want to dig up some weirdness on a different day I won’t argue!
Be sure to let us know in the comments if you think these reviews are cool or lame or whatever. Also check the sidebar for a poll soon after the first WTF?! reviews go live.
