Posts Tagged ‘useless’

A direct quote from RustyCroc’s app review request:
“OUR APP MIGHT SUCK BALLS LOL BUT CHECK IT OUT AND LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK.  I AM ONLY 17 YEARS OLD AND IT WAS MY FIRST APP, I AM TRYING TO PAY FOR COLLEGE.”
Love the CAPS LOCK, love the upfront admission that the app sucks balls [...]

Dude! Duuuuuude! Duuuude.
That’s basically all this app does… it says DUDE, over and over and over again. It says Dude like you just spilled a beer, it says Dude like you just nailed your best friend’s girlfriend, it says Dude like you just violated several sacred Man Laws all at once. It says Dude in [...]

If you’re ridiculously superstitious you might actually like this “app”. Notice that I put “app” in quotations… it’s only an iPhone app in the sense that you can download it from the iTunes App Store and put it on your iPhone! Oh yeah, and it was also one of the first apps available when it [...]

I installed Singing Cat thinking it would be the dumbest iPhone app on the planet, and it definitely qualifies as dumb… but it’s also kind of funny! I guess it would fall into that class of apps that are basically a cheap laugh, then after about five minutes it gets old and you forget about [...]

All snow globes, both real and virtual, are inherently useless. But Richard Baker’s TUI SnowGlobe isn’t just useless… it’s also strange and kind of funny. Unlike most snowglobes there’s no music to speak of, but there are a total of six oddball “scenes” (plus the obligatory developer promo) to be revealed by shaking your iPhone.
My personal [...]

You Shake iLaugh… well, I guess you know what this app does already! Shake it and an illustrated mouth will either laugh at you or with you, depending on how you choose to see it.
According to the iTunes App Store description, “the harder you shake it the harder it will laugh, until it reaches an [...]

Pet Dog is an awesome game… FOR ME TO POOP ON!!
Seriously, this ad-supported app is so dumb it’s funny. You’re supposed to tap the two paw pads on the screen to make the dog walk. Tap faster and the dog goes faster. Once you get going, you don’t even need to tap both paws… tapping one works [...]

I never got a chance to play with Ryan Youngman’s iSaber before George Lucas squashed his little Star Wars iPhone tribute. It sucks that they pushed him out of the App Store, but at least they were kind enough to put together a worthy replacement.
TheMacBox’s version of Lightsaber Unleashed is exactly what you’d expect it [...]

I just got done bitching about an app called Lighter because the developer is planning to charge for it after the free trial is over. It doesn’t look like Moderati is planning to charge for the Virtual Zippo Lighter… my guess is that Zippo already paid them plenty to engineer this exercise in brand marketing… so [...]

I’m feeling kind of ornery today, so I’m gonna rip on an application just for existing. Normally I wouldn’t do this to a free app, but according to Chillingo Ltd’s description for Lighter, the free deal is a “special introductory offer – free for 1st week!”
So how much are they going to be charging? 99 [...]

Looks like I’m a few days late getting on this bandwagon, but I am absolutely OUTRAGED that Apple would reject this application!
If you believe Pull My Finger should be available in the App Store (and that Apple needs to get a sense of humor) please send your impassioned plea to sjobs@apple.com.

Hee Button’s description in the App Store is written in English (barely), so I installed it. According to ObjectGraph LLC, Hee Button is “from a famous Japanese TV show!”
And what, pray tell, are you supposed to do with this wacky Japanese Wooo Button equivalent?
“Push the button when you have a good trivia!”
Yeahhh ok then. Push [...]